Stephanie's Dreams

A paper to have been delivered at the Geneva Conference

Transgendered people indeed cross Society's deepest divide and it is equally a point that Gender identity lies at the core of our personhood.In this regard, it is a fact that Transgenders exist in every society and they deserve to be helped and assisted in all ramifications.

The advent of sex change Surgeries which came in the early 50's had definitely enlightened the entire World and made more people realize that there was something more to gender identity than just reporting on one's genitals.George Jorgensen who is now Christine Jorgensen in the early 50's made it palpable to the World that sex was more or less a matter of hormones and with the proper dosage of the correct hormones the human nature could be redefined.George now Christine, being the first individual that had a sex reassignment Surgery has obviously and definitely encouraged me to put my records straight and assert myself in my true and real perspective.If George could be successful with the sex change and become first individual and first American to be reassisgned into a ' right body ' then i have decided to become the first Nigerian to be reassigned into a ' right and appropriate body '.

Before this realization i have gone through alot of psychological trauma and i have practically been on the precipice of indecision.How on earth will i allow a hark Surgeon to put a knife on my genitals and get them sliced off, i thought.The thought was awefully morbid and i pined the practicability of such an ordeal.Though, i never liked my body as a Male, i still could not reconcile myself to the idea of having my genitals sliced off just like that.I definitely would not want to be used as a biological speciment, i thought piognantly.

It was not as if i had not done a Surgery before, infact i had when i was pretty small,but it was basically a minor Surgery which had to do with Hernia.A more complex Surgery which has to do with sex reassignment was thus very fearsome and infact abjectly morbid.I would rather remain as a transgender, i cogitated, but never will i allow a hark Surgeon to slice off my genitals.A couple of years afterwards, i visited a couple of Libraries and i consumed myself in educative books on Transsexuals.Later, i began to realize that Transsexuals lived more fufilled and peaceful lives than the mere Transgender.And in most Societies Transgenders are subjected to a whole lot of agony and problems.Infact the problematic state of the Transgender is so fearsome and worrisome that at the end of the day the sex change Surgery is more preferable.Why on earth will i subject myself to the harrowing stress of confronting an antagonistic Society that is embedded in cultural fanatism.Why would i want to be continually arrested and brutalized by a Police force that is been orchestrated by Societal norms and values.And why on earth i thought would i want to be ridiculed and disgraced a thousand times by mere individuals who prefer to see me as an abberration.The feelings of Transgenderism and Transsexualism were definitely very strong, but i certainly did not want to remain as a Woman with a male genitalia .So, the idea of sex reassignment Surgery had gradually made practical sense in my mind.Man was chemical afterall, and if estrogen therapy could do wonders to the body of Man, then i suppose Medical science could perform more wonders on the body of Man.Being at the library was indeed quite fun and enlightening, and i was able to read the experiences of other reknowned Transsexuals.Transsexualism was indeed  a kind of life battle, the battle to be who you really are and the battle to emancipate yourself from a ' wrong body '.

That very particuler day at the library i felt empathy and remorse for all Transsexuals all over the World, particulerly when i considered what most of them have gone through in life.Pains of my traumatic past enveloped me in sorrow, as i pensively considered what the future could be like.But that very moment, i knew i had my destiny in my hands, and i certainly knew i could make it with the knowledge i have got.

I commenced hormonal therapy almost immediately and the estrogens were pretty okay with me.Infact my health blossomed as i started with the estrogens and the effects of it has been quite elating.My nipples grew in size, muscles slowly replaced with softer tissues, voice becomes softer, and eventually my body approached a Womanly ideal that i had only dreamed of.This indeed was a true transition to Womanhood, but would i just stop there, and remain a Woman with a Male genitalia.The idea of a rudimentary vagina being put inplace, and excising the penis then became a joyful decision to make.Atleast, i would feel more comfortable with my new vagina and i would be able to have more comfortable sex than i used to.Indeed having anal sex was already a part of me, and i was indeed a pro in the act.As a matter of fact my anal region was already as large and effective as a steady vagina, so the idea of having a rudimentary vagina would imply having two vaginas, and how great that could be.

To be a Lady with two vaginas.But i was not going to let my life centered on sex after the sex change, i thought.I would rather fashion my life like that of other prominent and well respected Transsexuals.

For instance, the reverend Lady Sarah Jones who is an oxford graduate and acoustic guitarist.Sarah Jones had a sex change after so many years of confusion and conviction, and today she is a reverend Lady concentrating on being a good curate and being hopeful to be ordained bishop soon.Should that become a reality, Jones will become the first female bishop in the Church of England.And should Stephanie's Dreams become a reality, i would become the first sex changed transsexual in Nigerian History.

May our Dreams all come True.

Love  and  Tears ,

Stephanie from Nigeria

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